We’re Booked

When the schedule you want is unavailable, here’s how different kinds of hotels might write the notification:

Harsh: “We’re full. Go away.”

Dramatic: “We have spurned your advances! Our hearts, er, rooms are fully booked. We apologize to the depths of our being.”

Scientific: “As much as we want to squeeze you in, Pauli’s exclusion principle disallows it”

Millennial: “We literally can’t even. We’re booked AF.”

Corporate Memo: “Please be advised that the schedule you have chosen is not available at this time. We apologize for any possible inconvenience we may have caused you—not that we have done anything legally wrong by doing so, since we have not committed to anything yet.”